What can happen in six hours? You can hike the Y. You can study for a test, take it, and fail it. You can take a nap. You can go to SLC. You can watch He’s Just Not That Into You. Let’s be honest, you could probably do all that I just listed. But, Apartment 29, we IZ SPEEECIAL. Guess what we can do in 6 hours time? You guessed…probably wrong. No we did not ROB a BANK, or prank someone, or have a random dance party. It’s much simpler and classier. Psssssssssshhhhhhh……NOT.
Give us a clean room. And in less than 6 hours…BAM. Done. MESSY as HECK. No joke. It must be the heavy traffic that we experience, from us coming in and going out, that or little goblins live in our vents. I’m going to say the latter.
Our apartment cannot stay clean for more than 6 hours. Don’t question it. It’s true. You could say that it is as good as a scientific maxim. Or it’s more along the lines of entropy. Faster than you can say “triskaidekaphobia” a once sparkling, clean apartment is transformed into a room that has more crap than …………[as I write this, one of our friends says “Cookies”. Faster than a fat kid can shove a pop-tart in his mouth, we start jumping up and down and screaming about the possibilities of what kind of cookies they are and how we can get our fat lil’ hands on ‘em and in our stomachs]……...this may be what contributes to the messiness of our apartment. WE ARE FAT KIDS.
WE DON’T PICK UP AFTER OURSELVES. I am not saying this cuz I’m mad, I’m just sayin’…here’s another rule for ya. If there’s one dish in the sink, it’s a lost cause. It like saying, “hey! There’s a dish in here, that means that YOU don’t have to wash your dishes!” I know for me, I don’t feel as guilty when I see one little dish in there. It’s giving me a license to not wash them. It feels good.
But, hey, our apartment is messy. YOU CAN’T CHANGE US! That’s what we do. We sporadically clean for three hours like maniacs and then sit on our lazy bums for three days not cleaning a thing. It’s not bad. It's us.
Stay too legit to quit.
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